This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize