I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
third nipple confirmed
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
