I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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