My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
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