Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
