Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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