Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
17 year olds will be the death of me.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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