Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
