I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Randomize
