She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
