i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
