So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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