and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She bit a glass in half.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
