Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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