She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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