I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
