my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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