this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize