so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
