What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
