Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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