Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
