she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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