he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
