Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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