Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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