Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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