Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
