I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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