I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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