i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
