Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize