I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
