Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
