wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
