the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
