69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Randomize
