Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
