are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
