dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
