hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
