you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
