Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
