i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
