brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
