would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
