this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize