Nicole vs. Life
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
