so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
