they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Randomize
