I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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