thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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